Change is hard. Coaches can help.

I do two kinds of coaching: one is ADHD coaching where I collaborate with my clients to facilitate positive changes in their lives. The other kind of coaching is athletic coaching; specifically softball at the middle school level.  There my role is teach players how to perform certain actions and to educate them about the game and their role in it.  In both coaching arenas I often see someone who continues to perform a task or routine in a way that they are frustrated with.  My ADHD coaching clients frequently get upset by the fact that no matter how hard they try they seem to fall back into old patterns of procrastination or disorganization.  My softball players are upset by the fact that they look at a called third strike when they know they should swing, or continually misplay a fly ball.  In both cases the individuals in question have made an effort to change, but found the effort so mentally or physically tiring that they unconsciously reverted to old patterns or techniques that they no longer want to pursue.

Why is it so hard to change these existing patterns?  New research into the ways the human brain functions have led to some insight.  I am far from an expert in this area, but here is how I understand what the current line of thought (no pun intended) indicates: The brain has to process a staggering amount of information all of the time, but our conscious mind can only handle so much at once.  Habits are formed so that we can unconsciously manage easy, familiar activities and concentrate on new challenges or stimuli.  This sounds like a good way to handle things right up until you want to change the way you are doing something.  Suddenly you are trying to undo some very hardwired items in your brain.  An extreme example would be someone who decided they would like to learn to write with their left hand instead of their right hand.  It's going to take a lot of hard work and practice before doing so would feel at all natural.

When I coach softball players I talk about building "muscle memory".  Of course your muscles aren't building memories, but you are reinforcing a habitual way to field a ground ball so that during a game you can concentrate on things like the game situation.  When I work with kids or adults with ADHD I keep reminding them that it will take time and practice to build new pathways in their brains as they try to develop new ways of doing things.  Part of my role in both areas is to encourage the new behavior, remind the person about the reasons for it, and recognize the success my player or client is having.

If you are someone who has been diagnosed with ADHD and are finding it difficult to change old patterns or create new habits I would strongly encourage you to explore how an ADHD Coach can help.
Think of them as a personal trainer at the gym, or a pro on the golf course.  They are there to offer guidance, support, and accountability.  They can provide you with valuable feedback, and offer suggestions on new strategies to try.  Ultimately change is up to the individual, but going it alone can be awfully hard.  For more information on finding an ADHD Coach in your area, visit CHADD's website at www.chadd.org and click on "finding support".  The right coach can make all the difference in the world if you're an athlete; the same is true if you have ADHD.