Coaching works, but only if you're ready for the commitment!

I have three daughters all of whom participate in a variety of team sports.  My middle child is a basketball fanatic.  Last year,as a Freshman in High School she not only made the varsity team, but also came off the bench and played some significant minutes.  However her Sophomore year things didn't go quite as well.  She still played Varsity basketball, and started some games.  In her mind though she took a step back.  She saw herself as an elite player, and thought her coach did too.  Early on in the season her coach let her know that she had fallen behind some of the other kids.  Her offense wasn't there.  She was crushed.  While she soldiered on there were definitely times where it seemed like her heart just wasn't in it.  This caused her mother and I a fair amount of distress.  How could this kid who worked so hard on her game, and cared so much be so down on herself?

Once the High School season is over many kids in the area continue to play basketball for various club teams.  My daughter has played for the same club team for a while, and this year they decided to align themselves with a local organization that offers practice space, schedules games, and does skills instruction.  Yesterday I took her to a skills clinic and stayed behind to watch.  There were probably forty girls there, and they literally spent an hour doing nothing but different dribbling drills.  The instructor was all business.  

"You may be good, " he said to all of them, "but if you want to be elite, you need to work on every aspect of your game.  You need to get better.  You need to commit to practicing on your own."  At the end of the session as we walked to the car my daughter said "hey Dad, can I keep coming down here in the summer?"

I considered my response for a moment.  " Well, I certainly think what he's teaching is valuable.  But, you would need to show me you're committed to practicing on your own, like he said."

"I will, " she replied, very seriously, "I want to get better.  I want to blow my coach away next year."

This, in a nutshell, is what a Parent needs to hear from their son or daughter before seriously beginning to explore ADHD Coaching.  While a kid may want to get more organized, or may want to stop feeling like they can never follow through on anything they need to commit to the process of improving their executive skills and becoming more effective.  When a High School or College student buys into the coaching process the results are noticeable.  Simply committing to keeping a calendar with classes and appointments, and establishing a reminder system are two huge steps forward.  Learning self advocacy skills, developing the ability to plan ahead, and the willingness to be held accountable all lead to a great improvement in the quality of life for a younger person.  

In the case of may daughter, practice and skills enhancement will lead to improved performance on the basketball court.  Improved performance will lead to increased confidence.  More confidence leads to greater self esteem and pride.  This leads to the love of practice and skills enhancement.  It's a positive self sustaining cycle.  Likewise, in the life a person with ADHD, improved performance and self esteem reinforces the desire to sustain the structures and systems that have helped them improve.  But the nature of ADHD can make it difficult to remain consistent in maintaining these systems.  Having a Coach as a center of accountability creates a safety net for the individual as they build new skills and banish old habits.  

Coaching works.  If you want to get better, if you want to improve your day to day performance, and make your life better, then finding a Coach can work wonders for you or your son or daughter.  The only key ingredient that is absolutely required is commitment.  After that, the sky is the limit for how far someone can go.